1/2 Marathon

14" x 18" Acrylic and glitz on Canvas

Blindly

Yesterday, blindly I felt your touch

your breath

breathed upon my sleeve

Yesterday, your love

encompassed me

seducing the very inch of me

Yesterday

you lived within me

touching

moving me

Today

I see strings

stretching

pulling

welcoming

new love

awakening

the depth of me

Today

blindly

engulfing my being

The rain

pellits down

washing away leaves

from a tree

Today

I stand naked

bursting with relief

Years of wisdom

Years of knowledge

floating down a river

so I can remain

free

Father ~ Daughter

This story is not particularly pretty. Most "real life" stories aren't. They are made for Hollywood. I was inbetween 2nd and 3rd husbands. My boyfriend and I went to a club where we encountered my 2nd husband. He was angry. My boyfriend became angry. I got the black eye. I was inbetween my 2nd husband and my boyfriend. We left the club with my boyfriend driving my car. He dumped me on the highway. I went to a stranger's house and dialed a taxi. I arrived home. I called the police to report my car being stolen. My boyfriend arrived. He beat me. The police arrived. I bit the policeman on his hand while he was grabbing me. I called my dad from jail to ask him to get me out. He came and posted my bail. It went to court. The policeman I bit apologized. Case was thrown out. My point being? That night my dad bailed me out... my memory was of myself crying in a corner of my home asking to whatever...what's wrong with me.. and my mom answering...what's wrong with you? That night, I truly bonded with my dad. He laughed that I had bit an officer.

Where does this post arrive from? We're only human. To live from one's heart is what it is. A friend lives from his heart. I watch him sacrifice. So perhaps that's the core of this post. Living with humans who sacrifice.

Stories from a Patient's Book

My Children
Are Coming Today

My children are coming today. They mean well. But they
worry.
They think I should have a railing in the hall. A telephone
in the kitchen. They want someone to come in when I
take a bath.
They really don't like my living alone.
Help me to be grateful for their concern. And help them to
understand that I have to do what I can as long as I
can.
They're right when they say there are risks. I might fall. I
might leave the stove on. But there is no challenge, no
possibility of triumph, no real aliveness without risk.
When they were young and climbed trees and rode
bicycles and went away to camp,
I was terrified. But I let them go.
Because to hold them would have hurt them.
Now our roles are reversed. Help them see.
Keep me from being grim or stubborn about it.
But don't let me let them smother me.

Infirmities

In line, in the supermarket,
I stood next to a young woman with a baby.
The baby drooled,
His mother smiled and wiped his mouth with a tissue.
The baby seized the tissue and threw it to the floor.
His mother picked it up, laughing.
He grabbed it again and threw it under our feet.
Again and again.
His mother laughed.
The baby squirmed, disarranged his clothes,
Grew red in the face,
Babbled gibberish.
His mother cuddled him and smiled
Would she be so gentle,
So understanding, so kind,
To an old father, trembling, murmuring,
Wandering in his mind?
Am I? To my friends who falter and fail.
Why do the infirmities of age revolt us?
They seem unnatural.
We're wrong; all living things move gently toward decay.
Is a blasted oak revolting?
Are we afraid? Yes. I draw inwardly away
From my failing friends because I see
Myself in them. I don't drool,
But tomorrow I may. My hands shake
And I don't always catch what people say.
Help us to be as gentle with old people
As we are with infants.
Help us to look past the tic, the tremor, the gray
Failed flesh the way
We look past the baby's helplessness to see
A unique self
Reflecting Your divinity.

My Choice

At 13, menses arrived

not my choice

I was surprised

At 13, cramping and blood

oh how I wished

to be a guy

At 13, emotions ran high

not in control

wondering why

3 births later

I had a choice

I gave birth

to my beautiful children

3 births later

never knowing

I had a choice

Yet to learn

someone wants to

take away

"my choice"

It was embedded into my brain

You get pregnant

You have a child

No choice

Today

I speak for a choice

circumstances

subscribed for the child

unborn

Personally

my children

couldn't imagine

life without them

I didn't know I ever had a choice

So naturally

You get pregnant

You have the child

Why must man

take upon

the responsibility

of what nature

has to say

Let nature

have its way

Individually

you have a choice

Empty Nest

The house is empty

I know it best

years of living

trying to digest

I ramble through

memories of me and you

that's how I forgive

what you did to us

rambling through

Years were best

when you weren't here

appreciating

time spent alone

Today

memories rambling

I wish you no harm

but thoughts

of finding your way

We were lost souls

connecting at bay

lost souls

who didn't know their way

Today

the house is empty

children grown

going their own way

with love from me

guiding their way

Thoughts of you

wishing to tap

to bring inside

yet

as then

you are a stranger

losing

your way

I could cry

I could scream

yet it wouldn't matter

you weren't there

when it mattered

so to hell with you

strangers

always

Do I Stay?

Do I walk away

or do I stay

Is there really

magic in the moon?

Do I walk away

or do I stay?

"Cannot imagine

my life

without you in it"

Is it true?

To stay hurts

To love so deeply hurts

Do I stay

or do I walk away?

Will the magic in the moon suffice tonight?

Head held high

Smiling brightly

Again

Love wins

Struggling deep within

"I cannot tell a lie"

still seems to be alive

Not revealing

Not a lie

Choices to be made

Will I stay?

or will I walk away?

Your choice has been made

I am walking away

Damnit

You know I can't

Connection is too strong

When love is here

Love wins

http://www.democrats.com/pass-the-peoples-budget?source=hceragioli%40aol.com

Famous Words ~ "I will call you tonight"

Of all the things coming into my life

trust me

"I will call you tonight"

is not one of them

I have realized

it is the hidden

things that mean the most

the hidden heart

the hidden wounds

that take attention to

a simple

"I will call you"

doesn't matter

for that is a trusted

friendship

where all things will bloom

what am I hiding

what do I not tell

the secrets of my heart

the day of ecstasy

with a friend

yes

only a friend

where connection

is made

spiritual

realm

where we only gaze

ecstasy

was reached

as if

it were real

real

to me

real to him

it exists

in another

dimension

physically on earth

as if all time matters

knowing in reality

it only exist

in the heart

in the heart

of the matter

it is real

Tall Beauty

I still have alot of work to do in my flower beds - as one can see. Yet, the flowers still bloom as if they don't care about their surroundings. Most of my flowers were given to me by friends and neighbors. I absolutely adore these tall beauties because of their strength and color. Purple is my favorite. Iris - it takes it name from a Greek word for the rainbow for the Iris comes in a variety of colors.

I recently learned something - totally off the subject of my flowers - but I learned what "half light" means. Half light means to be in the "light" of another. All of these years, and I just figured it out. For some reason, this takes me to love. I heard love is friendship on fire. Now that totally makes sense to me.

Going back to my flowers, as you can see, they're shining more in the sunlight ~ love ~ friendship on fire. Lovely.

Senior Prom ~ Love Circle

By Beth Ceragioli

Mellow Yellow

Hello bright yellow
You golden mellow fellow
You may be short bus slow
like Rapunzel, head hung low

When you move as fast as lightening,
life might seem slightly frightening
So sit back and eat a banana
And try to drive at 5 o'clock in Atlanta

Kick back, and feel the sun on your face
Or present a duck with your grace
The feeling of yellow never to be replaced
Except for custard gracing you with its' taste

Yellow sunny D pours through my lips
it's amazing how fast time can slip
So like a yellow light take it slow
And savor the moment before you go

Hockey and Tanks

I took these pics yesterday as I was stuck on I24-E coming home from work yesterday. Seeing these tanks in Nashville was a strange thing for me. Thoughts of the different wars going on went through my head. Couldn't figure out where these tanks were heading. I told my mom about the tanks this morning when I called her. She told me of the story when her and my dad, after they first were married, drove all the way from Wilmington to Alabama behind a tank with the big old gun pointing at them the whole way. She laughed about it as she was telling me but said it was the longest trip of her life. The year was 1944.

My son took this pic Thursday night and sent to me. He was at the Predators vs. Avalanches hockey game in Denver. The Predators won. Yea Preds!