Where I Was...

When I think about where I was

and where I want to be

the memory takes me back

exactly to where I was

It  wasn't a good place

it wasn't even a safe place

it was a financial place

where money was no problem

When I think about where I was

and where I want to be

I remember

the longing

for love

Forgiveness has set in

yet the memory hasn't left

I know exactly where

I want to be

Financially

not a happy place for me now

yet

Emotionally

again

forgiveness set in

but

I don't want to be

where I was

Timelessness

discovered

love

Love in a place

where love truly exists

within myself

To love oneself

is a job

a daily job

where all others

expose you

disclose you

yet

you learn

it is ok

to be yourself

I remember
how it felt
to be
unloved
by you

Today...

Ecstasy

I experience

daily

Remembering me

and where I

wanted to be

The rememberance

of a love

still burning

I

remember

the kiss

 the yearnings

the desire

which swept me off my feet

taking me away

from all

that use to be

One day.....

you will find your way

back to me...



Letting go...again

I can't make you someone you're not

I can't open your eyes

to your specific religion

I can

Hold your hand

as you navigate

through life

Which I did

for the last

4 years

The intensity

of the missing

of your passion

touches my soul

The intensity

of the love for

your children

overwhelms me

I can

Openingly

Forgive you

for making me play this part

a soul of love

a soul of devotion

to life

not of deadness

of weakness

of powerlessness

Words are deep here

trying to express

in simple terms

4 years

of connectiveness

Find your home

within yourself

not within your religion

not within your values

of what is right

what is wrong

Find your home

of happiness

that is what

I wish for you,

my dear, sweet man



A Stone

I am a stone

buried beneath the sand

sparkling and shining

waiting to be found

I am a stone

don't paint me

with your acrylic colors

I am nature

perfect as I am

I am a stone

discover me

waiting to be found

My light shines

upon the needy

upon the lonely

upon myself

I am a stone

see me

as I am

Happier

 

My heart is my center

love pours

inside and out

My heart is my center

no beginnings

no ends

My heart is my center

as myself

I walk this path

with all

whose path

cross

Love remains

forever

and

the

same

Shuffling Through

This week weekend,

I had an idea,

A feeling,

A wanting,

A desiring,

to be outside.

I took my twin mattress

outside

to my deck

idealizing

me and Betty

sleeping under the stars.

Far be it from me

to realize

locks...

I'l be damned

if I didn't lock myself

out of my house...

Betty,

inside...

with like..

what the fuck

Yes,

I slept outside on my deck

alone...

Betty, my dog

on the inside

switch of role plays here

The thing

is

no phone

no nothing

only

the open

universe

Where is this settling taking me

What is my heart's desire

it is a desire for freedom

from this tiresome world

The political

of who can get

the most votes

It is freedom

Freedom

to breathe

Freedom

to live

Freedom

to just be me

Physical

The spiritual world

confused me

with the physical world

Being, I think,

a spiritual being

experiencing

a physical world

I still see myself as

physical

I know what I like

and what I don't

it appears

in this situation

....

the spiritual tried to

take hold

of the physical

A lesson learned

many years ago

I am a spiritual

being

having a human

experience

Human being

I am attracted

to the physical

No powers of God

if you believe in such

will hold me

physically attached

It all makes sense

if only to me

I know who I am

and what I like

so

it's not you



How Dare You

How Dare You

How dare you give me false hope

each morning

delivering

to me

a love

which didn't exist

How dare you

weaving me into your life

where I wouldn't exist

How dare you

loving me

with a love

which was promised

to someone else

My heart is so pure

I can only forgive you

but

I can be pissed

pissed at the nature

of the deliverance

of such

sorry love

Again

rising to my feet

rising to me

rising to goodness

knowing

I

deserve

true love

Perhaps I will never

experience it

but

in my crazy artistic mind

I already

have pure love

I love myself

more than I can say for you

I only see

a wuz

of

a

shadow of a man

I love my life

Simply

Being
Me

 



Freedom

A ghost roams my head

reminding me of times left behind

My spirit is free

naked for all to see

Habits die

Past is gone

Let me live

enjoying

every new moment

every new day

every new step

I walk this earth

Leaving behind

all which I do not need

a memory

Celebrate today

realizing

today is all I have

this is my prayer

this is my meditation

to the universe

Take away the old

bring about the new

let me be naked

and fresh

every

day

Joy to life

Joy to love

Respect to all

with such gratitude

to old friends

and new

Coffee Table 6-5-12

This table is full of beauty

the shimmer of the soul

as it shines

inside

Closing my eyes

to the outside

of hatred

which exists in this world

the violence

of the nonsense

painted on the sleeves

of many

political minds

This table is mine

Welcome

to

my

home



Half of Coffee Table

Window Hanged

"Live each moment,

Laugh every day,

Love beyond words."

End Table 2

I painted the matching end table this morning.  My coffee table had 2 separate glasses.  I replaced with the marble from my 2 end tables.  Now I will paint the marble coffee table.